#1 Reason Your Daughter Needs A Worry Free Toolkit

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Is it because you have a history of anxiety in your family?  Maybe.

It is because your child’s mind runs wild when she lays down to go to sleep, and she cannot seem to shut off her brain?  Maybe.

Is it because your daughter perseverates on details like, “What if I don’t get invited, or I don’t get an A on this project?” and cannot let the thoughts go?  Maybe.

While those are all good reasons you might consider a Worry Free Toolkit Workshop for your daughter from Wise Girls Workshops, that is not the primary reason your daughter needs one.

THE #1 REASON YOUR DAUGHTER NEEDS A WORRY FREE TOOLKIT

Everyone deals with worry.

You might be thinking, “What?  That’s it?”

And I am saying, “Yup, that’s it!”

You see worry can become apart of our life for a moment in a time or in a way that lingers—-for minutes, hours, days, weeks, months, or even years.

Either way, worry is a normal human emotion.  It shows up for everyone at times.  Who couldn’t benefit from learning tools to recognize the feeling for what it is, developing tools to help care for yourself, and having some time to practice those skills?

What a gift, right?!

There are some other benefits for developing a Worry Free Toolkit:

  • Your daughter will feel more in control of herself when worry takes hold and will know she can care for herself.
  • Through the Wise Girls Workshops experience, kids will see they aren’t alone in terms of worrying and see many of their peers have similar fears.  This fact provides relief!
  • She will stop asking you to reassure her about things over and over and over and over….
  • Your daughter can recognize it in others and provide helpful support.
  • She will learn how feelings constantly change and while worry might feel big in the moment, we never get stuck in one feeling forever.

This Worry Free Toolkit business is good stuff, right?  Developing tools to cope with worry isn’t just for those who have a serious problem with anxiety.  We all need tools.  We all deal with it.  Everyone can benefit.

Summer 2019 Wise Girl Workshops!

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Looking for something outstanding and different from all the other camps floating around out there? Want your girl to have fun, simultaneously learning about how to thrive socially and emotionally? Look no further! Wise Girl Workshops promises to be a unique experience geared towards girls in 5th/6th and 7th/8th and 9th/10th grades that will truly make a difference in their summer and life.

I am being serious about the make a difference in their life part. I have had girls and parents tell me what an impact this camp has had. One parent told me, “This camp changed my daughter’s life for the better. I am serious. It changed her life.” I had one girl who I saw years later tell me how much this camp helped her in managing the anxiety she feels. Parents will tell me their kids are still using their “coping cards.” I am always to honored and motivated to do more when I hear comments about the major impact Wise Girl Workshops has.

Yes!!! More is happening during Wise Girl Workshops Summer 2019. This year the awesome Tina Parrish, a talented and experienced Certified Personal Trainer, is ready to work with your girl about how to use fitness to nurture the mind and body, cultivate and sustain a healthy body image, utilize it as a tool to manage worry and big feelings, and develop a plan that can support who your girl is as an individual.

Ready to sign your Wise Girl up? Look no further!

SIGN UP HERE!!!

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Sign Up Here!!!

“Crazy” Teenager

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“I feel like she’s crazy. I mean, I know she isn’t crazy. But it feels like she is crazy. Is she crazy?”

If you have ever said this in your mind, under your breath, or out loud, you are not alone. You are among the several millions of parents around the world raising this amazing, often misunderstood, and erratic creature…the teenager.

Teens do amazing things each day. From studying 6+hours a day to engaging in after school sports and clubs to volunteering to holding down a job to hanging out with friends, teens do it all. (Holy cow! That is a whole lot of being social in 1 day!)

Your teen may be able to handle a lot on the outside, but it is important to understand there is a whole lot more going on inside. What I am talking about is BRAIN DEVELOPMENT.

Look at the word in all capital letters again. Take it in.

BRAIN DEVELOPMENT.

That’s intense.

So intense those words are, it may look like your child is crazy. Rest assured, this crazy, intense time of life is just that, a crazy and intense time of brain development.

We don’t wake up one day and BAM, our brain is developed. This is a process that can take up until our late 20’s to complete. Different parts of the brain develop before others, so the part of the brain giving perspective, reasoning, and controlling impulses is one of the last to take shape. That’s a big deal because with limited perspective, reasoning, and impulse control, one can look pretty crazy!

Interested in learning about your teenager’s brain development so you can respond with more kindness, compassion, and sensitivity?

Check out:
“Maturation of the Adolescent Brain” by Mariam Arain, Maliha Haque, Lina Johal, Puja Mathur, Wynand Nel, Afsha Rais, Ranbir Sandhu, andSushil Sharma

The Mysterious Workings of the Adolescent Brain by Sarah Jayne Blakemore

Wise Girl Workshops Joins With Girl Scout Troop

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This November, 24 girls in 6th-8th grades embarked on a 2 day Journey and Wise Girl Workshops headed to Windsor, CA to be a part of it!  An amazing group of Girl Scout Cadettes worked diligently to earn their Journey Badge.  What an honor it was to help them think more about friendships, bullying, and how to handle conflict. I was struck by how engaged each girl was and how they gave great thought to each of the questions they worked on in their small groups.

From this event, I got to thinking how busy young girls are in their own lives and the drive to produce and get better is all around them, even for girls in 6th-8th grade.  These kids are already thinking so hardcore about their future.

There is a pressing anxiety in the world.  Who has time to think about friendship, bullying, and how to handle conflict?  The message kids get when their isn’t time to talk about these important areas of their life?  Just shove your feelings inside and move on.  It’s not important. Just keep moving forward.

This workshop allowed girls to slow down and think about some of the most pressing issues of their developmental time.  Friendship is an essential part of growing up and helps set the stage for how we function in life with others.

Upon ending the workshop the girls shared a few words on how the time we spent together made them feel.  Girls said things like they felt informed and educated.  Girls said they were relieved to talk and hear from one another.  Some of my favorite feedback of the day?  “Better.”  So many girls felt “better” after talking together.   I couldn’t ask for anything more.

Wise Girl Workshops mission to to change the world one girl at a time.  Thanks Windsor, CA Girl Scout Troop #11302 for valuing girls and giving them the time they need to think and do what is truly important.

 

Parents, Ready To Make Some Changes?

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One of my favorite parts of being a therapist is helping parents become better parents. I love talking about the challenges and finding solutions to what can seem like insurmountable problems.

Parents can feel afraid of therapy. What will Sierra think if I tell her what my child is doing? Will she judge me? Will she think I am crazy?

Let me just put it out there. I won’t judge you. I will think you are a parent who is trying to do your best. And no, I won’t think you are crazy.

Especially because we all come from some place, and that some place modeled for us how to be an adult and parent. Hopefully some of that modeling was stellar. However, because we are human, some of the modeling we received might not have been the healthiest and unfortunately this can impact how we parent. This way of modeling may have been passed down for generations.

Maybe you come from a family where no one ever talked about their feelings, or the only way one ever got heard was to get angry. Maybe your parents weren’t emotionally available for you, or they were super permissive leading you to be a wild child.

Whatever the way of parenting that got passed down, I believe we owe it to our children to do our best to do it better.

This is where I come in. A parent can have great success in shifting their child or teen’s behaviors by doing their own work in therapy. Yes that’s right. One way I help families work with their child is through working on themselves.

If you aren’t sure who could benefit in coming to therapy, then let’s talk. If you are ready to start your journey to becoming a better parent, email me here, and let’s get started!

Wise Girl Workshops At It Again!

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Announcing a great opportunity for both 5th-6th and 7th-8th grade girls!  Wise Girl Workshops’ NEW School Year Toolkit is here.  12 awesome weeks to learn, grow, and share together.  Help your girl get all the tools to support her emotional and physical health this school year! <img src="flier.jpg" alt="wise girl workshop flier fall 2018">

Parenting Tips For the Road Trip

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Upon completing a fairly unplanned 2 1/2 week road trip with my 2 elementary school age kids, I am a mom and therapist with some sound advice about traveling with kids. Don’t do it!

Only kidding! This road trip had ups and downs and all the emotions in between. I would highly recommend traveling with your kids, and I wanted to pass along some lessons learned.

1. Be a mind reader and have within your reach all the “needs” your kids are going to have. Snacks, travel blanket, snacks, water, pillow, snacks, Kleenex’s, books, audiobooks, coloring supplies, movies, games, paper towels, snacks, charger, car sick medicine, and did I mention snacks?

2. Keep in tune with their need for food. If it’s been a few hours or you can see their tank running low then certainly make the effort to fuel. With my one child I can see a distinct mood change when she gets some chow from grumpy kid to funny, playful kid. Parents eat too. A hangry Mom or Dad is no fun either.

3. Pace yourselves. I know you may have plans, a schedule, ideas, and want to do it all, but a kid who is pushed to the max is no bueno. If you’ve been rafting all day and then want to stop at the brewery for a relaxing pint and meal you may be setting yourself up for disaster. Because what you actually may get is a melted down child and an angry parent combination. There couldn’t be a worse way to end your awesome day.

4. Limit the electronics. I hear so many parents talk about how their kids energy takes a turn for the worse when posted up in front of tv, phone, or video game systems. If you find your child cannot handle even having the device without a swirl of whining when they take a break, don’t bring it along.

5. Make room for the emotions and practice self care. I had a great time with my family, however, there were moments when I wanted to release their rafts into the wilderness while I floated in the peace of the river or allow them to go live with the lovely lady at the pottery painting studio. At times I felt burnt, sad, anxious, and overwhelmed. My whole family also felt this way at times. They weren’t going to be perfect and neither was I. So I needed to make room for all the feelings and also take care of myself by taking some time to read, exercise, and pray.

6. Practice mindfulness. Yes it is the buzzword of the times and that is because their is something to it. Pulling yourself into the exact moment of what was happening was helpful to me in so many ways. Feeling the mountain air make contact with my belly through a deep breath was medicine for many of the moods I encountered.

The advice could go on, however, as I tell all parents I work with, you know your kid best. You know their wants and needs and limits. There will be a time when they can do it all and when that time comes, it’ll be awesome. Until then….